The best advice on how to be a good Christian husband can be found in the Bible, God's marriage manual. There is no better source of information for men and women than the Originator of holy matrimony, our Heavenly Father. Several Books address the husband's role, particularly Ephesians, I Corinthians, Song of Solomon, and Malachi. The Book of Proverbs also offers practical instruction for married men, especially how to avoid committing adultery with "the strange woman." Knowing how to be a good Christian husband not only requires knowing the scriptures, but also a personal intimate relationship with God and a willingness to allow the Holy Spirit to lead. The man who will diligently apply the Word of God and seek counsel from the Holy Spirit will succeed in any endeavor, marriage included.
Before a man can learn how to be a good Christian husband worldly myths about holy matrimony and the husband/wife relationship must be destroyed. God did not design a wife as a doormat, a whipping post, or a sex slave; but rather a help meet, or suitable, to walk alongside the male for a lifetime in a mutually satisfying intimate union. The marriage relationship was originally designed to be monogamous, exclusive and permanent. As the weaker vessel, women are nurtured, cherished, respected, protected and loved. In exchange, a godly wife will gladly render unto the husband due benevolence. There will be no need to beat a wife into submission, nor to keep her "barefoot and pregnant" in order to exert male authority. The husband's knowledge of how to be a good Christian husband ensures that the wife is given opportunity to realize full potential as a human being, developing emotionally, creatively, and spiritually to become the perfect complement to the man. "And did [God] not make one? Yet had [man] the residue of the spirit. And wherefore one? That [God] might seek a godly seed. Therefore take heed to your spirit, and let none deal treacherously against the wife of his youth" (Malachi 2:15).
Ephesians, Chapter 5 demonstrates how to be a good Christian husband by using Jesus Christ as a role model. The Apostle Paul wrote this epistle to the church at Ephesus to illustrate how Christ, as the head or Husband of the universal Church, gave Himself sacrificially for the Body of Christ, which is the Bride. "For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing" (Ephesians 5:23-24).
Similarly, the husband is admonished to love the wife as himself. Men who want to know how to be a good Christian husband must first give themselves to their wives sacrificially. There is therefore, no room for selfishness. "Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; That [Christ] might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word, That [Christ] might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish. So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself. For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church:" (Ephesians 5:25-29).
For unmarried and married males, I Corinthians, Chapters 6 and 7 clearly outline how to avoid fornication prior to marriage, and how to be a good Christian husband after saying I do. "Know ye not that your bodies are the members of Christ? shall I then take the members of Christ, and make them the members of an harlot? God forbid. What? know ye not that he which is joined to an harlot is one body? for two, saith He, shall be one flesh. But he that is joined unto the Lord is one spirit. Flee fornication. Every sin that a man doeth is without the body; but he that committeth fornication sinneth against his own body. What? know ye not that your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost which is in you, which ye have of God, and ye are not your own? For ye are bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body, and in your spirit, which are God's" (I Corinthians 6:15-20).
Following Biblically sound principles of conduct for men is vital for marriage to succeed. But developing a personal intimate relationship with God equips men in how to be a good Christian husband. A man who is personally submissive to the will of God will be sensitive and submissive to the will of God for a wife and family. A praying man who is not ashamed to call Jesus Christ Lord makes wise choices, refrains from wicked imaginations, flees youthful lusts, and diligently pursues the heart, mind and will of God. As the man is led by the Spirit of God, the wife willingly allows the husband to become the spiritual head of the household. A man can operate fully in God-given authority, ruling over the wife in all humility and together, raising children to know God and obey the commandments. Just as God said of the patriarch Abraham, so will God say of a good Christian husband: "For I know him, that he will command his children and his household after him, and they shall keep the way of the Lord, to do justice and judgment; that the Lord may bring upon Abraham that which He hath spoken of him" (Genesis 18:19).