How To Love In Marriage

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How to love in marriage is through a relationship of commitment that is unconditional and not based upon material things or controlling others. Unconditional love comes from God. It is not based upon things that one can see. However, one can have this kind of love toward a mate by putting God first. Putting God first allows a Christian to have a focus in order to experience unconditional love and that focus is in the spirit instead of in the flesh. And to love Him with all the heart, and with all the understanding, and with all the soul, and with all the strength, and to love his neighbor as himself, is more than all whole burnt offerings and sacrifices (Mark 12:33). We can love our mate in the flesh but to do so in the spirit is a deeper love that comes from God. The Fruits of the Spirit working in our lives is how to love in marriage. We must be willing to set aside our selfish ambitions, earthly desires, sinful behavior, and work towards living in peace and harmony, to make sacrifices for the other partner when there is a need to do so.

Having genuine affection and fulfillment that comes from being in unity is how to love in marriage. Being dedicated to make sure that our partner is fulfilled is important and should be pursued. Partners who never share affection for each other may experience division. To be completely united means wanting to be close and share everything even when there are problems. And there will be problems. Through our difficulties we learn and grow. Without obstacles to overcome life would be boring. Marriage requires a determination to overcome the difficulties. In fact, couples will become closer when sticking together and solving problems together. There is strength in numbers.

When things are bad in a relationship couples need to figure out what happened to start them down the wrong road. Partners will have days when they do not feel like working on the relationship and learning how to love in marriage. Remember, just because you don't feel loving toward your spouse for one reason or another does not mean that you no longer care for him or her. It just means that there are good days and bad days and everyone has them. It is best not to go by how you are feeling at a given moment. Emotions can lead us to believe the wrong things. Emotions can trick us into actions that can lead to strife in the home. When a person experiences down times he or she should commit those feelings to the Lord, pray about them, and not be guilty of trying to over analyze those feelings. Keep being optimistic and thinking positive about each other. Trying to control our thoughts especially if contrary to the will of God is the best way to move forward. Think about what is good and not what is bad.

Take out the time to say, I love you to your mate and do it every single day. Over time couples may become critical of each other. People often take out their own frustrations on those they care for the most. This can come through as criticisms. Maybe ones spouse is untidy and picking up after him or her all the time is getting old. There can be conflict over these types of things if couples are not willing to communicate about them. The person who is always picking up after other family members should talk about what he or she is feeling. Partners should try to understand each other and work towards harmony in the home. This is another way to learn how to love in marriage.

Pay close attention to each others moods. If Sally seems down and sad do something to cheer her up. If Bill comes home upset over his job let him talk about how he feels and encourage him. How to love in marriage is through caring and being there when things are not going well. Never make light of someones problems because to them they are real and need some attention. We are all different. God made us unique and special. Just because it is not important to you does not mean that it is not important to your mate. We all need to develop good listening skills and take out the time to make our spouse feel cherished. Everyone likes to feel cherished. God cherishes His creation. He sent His only Son to die on a cross for every single person who has ever lived. This is worthy of contemplation when trying to figure out how to love in marriage.

A wise thing to do is to make a goal to learn about your partner. In order to do that one has to be willing to develop a relationship with that person. Sometimes couples are so busy with their lives that they do not really get to know each other. How to love in marriage is realizing that having a relationship requires time. Go on a couples retreat with a church group. Ask a friend to watch the kids over the weekend and go on a road trip. The important thing to do is to have some time together that is uninterrupted by trivial matters. This is a common occurrence in today's world because so many women are working full time jobs so the family can survive. When husband and wife both work full time jobs there is little time left for romance. Somehow find a way to make time to nurture each other. Let some things go at the house and take a trip. Make a decision today to set aside time for your marriage.

How To Love Your Kids

To understand how to love your kids, parents must first understand how God cares for us--unconditionally. It is not enough just to be a biological parent, but kids need to feel wanted regardless of faults, flaws, and frailties. That is the way God cherishes us, looking beyond our shortcomings and extending affection even when we sin. God is longsuffering, forgiving, and kind when kindness is not warranted. Our heavenly Father, therefore, expects those who believe in Jesus Christ to be affectionate towards others, especially children. "Beloved, let us love one another: for love is of God; and every one that loveth is born of God, and knoweth God. He that loveth not knoweth not God; for God is love. In this was manifested the love of God toward us, because that God sent his only begotten Son into the world, that we might live through him. Herein is love, not that we loved God, but that he loved us, and sent [the] Son to be the propitiation for our sins. Beloved, if God so loved us, we ought also to love one another." (I John 4:7-11).

The Word of God is filled with instruction on how to love your kids. Parents must first cherish offspring as a gift from God; secondly, provide natural sustenance for health and well being; thirdly, provide training and discipline; and last but not least, provide spiritual guidance that eventually leads to a saving knowledge of Jesus Christ. Parents who value and view children as gifts from God are not likely to be abusive. A good mother or father will regard sons and daughters as a rich inheritance, meant to be nurtured and protected from the evils of this world. Good parents instinctively know how to love your kids. "Lo, children are an heritage of the LORD: and the fruit of the womb is his reward. As arrows are in the hand of a mighty man; so are children of the youth. Happy is the man that hath his quiver full of them: they shall not be ashamed, but they shall speak with the enemies in the gate" (Psalms 127:3-5).

No child can succeed without necessary basic tools. Aside from feeling a parent's affection, children need food, clothing, and shelter. A warm bed, a full stomach, clean clothes, and a safe place to live are the very rudimentary things that help youngsters thrive. A child is not so concerned with the costliness of basic necessities, but can discern when those necessities are missing. Whether married or not, men and women who bear children absolutely must ensure that these very basic needs are met. To bring a child into the world and not care whether food, shelter or clothing is readily available is unthinkable. But parents who want to know how to love your kids can begin by placing a top priority on childrens' needs; not putting off the responsibility on the state, although welfare is available in dire circumstances. A man who is man enough to father a child must be man enough to provide for that child. "But if any provide not for his own, and specially for those of his own house, he hath denied the faith, and is worse than an infidel" (I Timothy 5:8).

Occasionally because parents are unsure of how to love your kids, mothers and fathers can become too permissive. Being overly permissive has very little to do with the size of one's pocketbook. Parents who struggle each day with poverty might indulge children in non-material ways, such as allowing truancy or failing to monitor homework assignments. Lesser educated mothers and fathers may feel inept when it comes to training their children. Many poor parents feel helpless in providing a good education; and may be reluctant to encourage kids to excel. Similarly, wealthy parents who seldom spend quality time with sons and daughters may have a tendency to inundate kids with expensive gadgets, toys, and clothes. Wealthier parents can afford to send children to the best private schools, yet have not learned how to love your kids. Instead, genuine affection is substituted with material goods and possessions. The end result of being overly permissive for poor or wealthy children is the same: a youngster that is undisciplined, disrespectful to authority, and unable to make good life choices. "He that spareth [the] rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him chasteneth him betimes" (Proverbs 13:24).

In discovering how to love your kids, parents must also provide an opportunity for little ones to discover Jesus Christ. Godly parents cannot afford to neglect a child's salvation. From the moment little ones are able to talk and comprehend simple concepts of good and evil, parents should share the plan of salvation. Taking the children to church on a regular basis, talking about God in ways they can readily understand, and helping youngsters make the right choice to become a child of God is the best way to demonstrate how to love your kids. "Then were there brought unto him little children, that he should put his hands on them, and pray: and the disciples rebuked them. But Jesus said, Suffer little children, and forbid them not, to come unto me: for of such is the kingdom of heaven. And he laid his hands on them, and departed thence" (Matthew 19:13-15). Moms and dads who may have fallen short in showing their children affection can begin today to demonstrate the love of Jesus Christ.



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